I asked Ian this a-fish-and-a-bird question about a week before we were to be married. A little late in the day, you might say. But truth is, this basic dilemma has been haunting us ever since we met, fell in love and decided we wanted to be together for better or for worse.

Ian’s a Japanese-Danish American who grew up in the laid-back, liberal world of Berkeley, California. Went into college to study physics, came out with a Master of Fine Arts in photography and related visual media. I’m a one-fourth Sri Lankan, three-fourths Bengali  Indian who grew up hopping from air base to air base across India. Studied English literature in college and drifted into a common haunt of English graduates – journalism. We met in 2000 when Ian took a semester off from college to circle the globe (literally) with four of his friends. Since then we have been traveling back and forth between continents, countries and cities in an effort to be together. After several years of long, painful separations, short break ups and fierce family opposition we got married Great Indian Style in 2006. But we never quite addressed the nesting question. Whenever we try answering it, we run into The Wall.

You see, Ian’s deeply attached to Berkeley and is miserable when he’s separated from it for long periods of time. And I’m deeply attached India and pine for my aging parents, who have dug in their roots in Calcutta. So we figure we should divide our time between both worlds. Work as freelancers, spend part of the year in the US and part in India. But how practical is this plan? How long can we sustain this nomadic lifestyle? Beyond just work this website is also part of our attempt to figure out where and what home is.

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